The journey started long before I made the decision to quit my job, sell my stuff and to just GO. I’m more than ready for this step, even though I don’t know what ‘being ready’ really means. There is ‘something’ whispering in my ear. ‘It’ says; ‘trust, let go and relax’. That energy makes me fly high. Uplifting. A feeling of joy, clarity and inspiration. The feeling, I believe, we suppose to feel all the time. It makes us happy and creative. Since 3 January 2016, the decision-making day, I feel like walking on mountaintops most of the time, with an amazing view. Zooming out of the limited me I sometimes think I am, making space for the ‘I am everything and unlimited’ feelings. In that feeling state I can do, have and be everything I want. Dreaming big. It feels like freedom, love and joy.
As I said… I feel like walking on mountaintops most of the time. Not all the time. There are some valleys to walk trough too. There is always a ‘next day’ or a ‘next week’ after making a choice or decision. At first you feel everything falls into place. A peak of confidence and clarity. It feels like this is exactly what I should do, no doubts about it.
But then, a day or week after… (Metaphorically speaking). All the limited believes and fears who are residing in me are popping up. ‘Do you really want this? Are you sure? What if this happens, What are you going to do if.. or… or..’ In this feeling state the entire world, of course, reflects back as a mirror… friends and family asking me questions about how, what and when, what makes me feel even worse. The decision I made is based on a strong feeling what is pointing the direction. I don’t know the details. It is challenging… to fully trust. All the fearful thinking patterns were I apparently still believe in showing themselves more than ever.
Not a good feeling, not at all. It’s makes fearful, till the moment I become aware of the thoughts I am thinking. I start to realize that the thoughts are coming from believing in lack. I can’t do, be or have this, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t…. If I keep believing in ‘I can’t’ I’m usually right. I can’t. If I start to let go of those believes and choose for thoughts what makes me feel good. I can. It sounds very simple, in fact it is. But it needs some practice, is what I experience.
Becoming aware of the negative believes is the first step, simply by acknowledging that I don’t feel good. Choosing for better feeling thoughts, till I FEEL it, is the second step. I play a game with myself. Every time when I don’t feel good, I start to thank the universe for letting me know I believe in ‘I can’t’, so I can start to think ‘I can’ thoughts till I feel it. I’m practicing with ‘little’ daily things.
I’m in Granada (Spain) for the ‘Change Education’ project (schoolclash.eu). I went one day earlier to see and explore Malaga. And yesterday I felt like having a really good sleep in a quit room, because I was so tired. I visualized myself in a silent and dark room. A few ours later after discovering Malaga, I walked by the ‘feelgood’ hostel and went in (It really was the name of the hostel;) I booked a bed in a mixed 10 bed dorm. Before the guy showed me the room he said; ‘You know what, I give you a private room’. A room for yourself, because in the other room there are a lot of smelly and snoring guys and you deserve better’. WAUW I totally forgot about the visualization I did in the morning. This is so good! Evidence of my ‘I can have, do or be’ feelings. I dropped off my bags, went to the hostel bar for a Sangria to celebrate!
I had the best sleep last night. I’m totally ready for the Schoolclash meeting today, and the start of the program and my birthday tomorrow! Practicing is fun!
It’s all about believes of I CAN, LETTING GO and TRUST! It doesn’t only work for ‘little things’, it does work for everything you want to be, do or have. It’s a universal law. When a negative thought pops up about the trip, or about anything else, I start to practice! It seems more difficult to create ‘bigger’ things, but in fact it is not. ‘It’s more difficult’ is again a limited believe. In the core of my being I know and feel that everything is possible. I trust the feeling of creating everything… and I’m learning to let go of the limited believes, simply by choosing unlimited ones!
It’s a lot of fun to play the game of this universe and see the evidence appear!
The way of trust… Do you like to play the game?
(Ps. I’m working on my English grammar… practicing by doing;)